? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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