one might say we're banned from that church
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I have peed in a lot of sinks
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
