Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
