dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
dude. I can hear the air.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
