There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize
