This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize
