Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
