We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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