I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
