Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
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