I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
