Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Randomize
