I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize