Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I didn't notice because vodka
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
