thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
