Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
