I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
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