i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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