My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Randomize
