That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
