i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Randomize
