Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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