So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Randomize
