i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Randomize