I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
