I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize
