just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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