Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Randomize
