Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
You dont lie about slip and slides
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
