I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
