I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Randomize
