Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize