he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
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