i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
