PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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