what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Randomize
