you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
