I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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