Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
