Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
