I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
