i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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