so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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