Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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