But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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