yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
