I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize