hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize