I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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