I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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